Teenagers, my peers, gathered around their youth leader, listening to gruesome details about Jesus' crucifixion and death. Every lash, nail, and insult pierced our consciences. My stomach does flips, and I want to throw up. How could I have done this to my Lord?
Fast forward a few years. In our Jesus the Savior class this week we discussed critiques of the common atonement theories, especially feminist critiques. The women we read from stated that the Christian Church was not worth staying in - women should get out now to save themselves. The reason is that atonement theories have glorified suffering. In short, those who are suffering are encouraged to stay in their oppresive situation, becaus either we should "WWJD" (suffer) or we should wait until something good comes from it (resurrection). The truth is, suffering is never salvific. While I disagree with the conclusion they come to, I think that how we use atonement theories can have a huge impact on the people we serve.
Which bring me to the memory I shared above. When we were being told, in detail, the suffering that Christ experienced on our behalf, a particular kind of response was illicited: guilt. What a horrible person I am! How could I have nailed Jesus to the cross! The response to this salvific act becomes not joy and freedom, but guilt and shame. This is very wrong. I believe that Jesus came, died, and rose again to take away my shame, no to make it greater. And then what becomes the purpose of this shame we feel at our part in Jesus' death? I must suffer like him! From my shame comes the need to do something to alleviate my guilt. See the cycle at work here?
Jesus death and resurrection was not a shaming event, but a saving event. Jesus did not die to make us feel bad about ourselves. Through the death of Jesus God chose to reveal Godself in one of the worst human events possible - a shameful public murder. As Jungel once said, God identifies Godself as a dead man. God is in our suffering, but not some helpless, ineffectual way. God is showing us who God is in our suffering. God came so that we might know freedom.
Obviously I don't have it all figured out. But one thing I do know - the story does not end at Good Friday. Somehow, even though we still die, death has been defeated. Death, alienation, and isolation will not last forever. And someday, we will be with God.
Amen.
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